Chapter 8
I liked Vivian from the start. It was not just that she might offer me what I wanted. It was her whole approach to the concept that was such a change. Gone was the angst.
‘What about a surrogate?’
‘I’ll fax you a profile.’
‘What about a donor?’
‘I’ll e-mail you some pictures and fax you their profiles, too.’
‘But don’t I have to come and give fresh supplies?’
‘Fresh, frozen, it’s all the same. But it would be good for you and the surrogate to meet. Why don’t you invite us?’
Oh, yes, I liked Vivian more and more. Her agency was Surrogate Family Program, now Fertile Ground as she could not register her former trading name. The faxes came grinding in. The surrogate was the easy part. One had stood out in Vivian’s mind. Tina’s profile came in on 7 January 2000.
Q: Would you be a traditional surrogate using the artificial insemination procedure?
A: No.
Q: Would you be a gestational surrogate using the IVF procedure?
A: Yes.
Q: Would you be a surrogate for a gay couple?
A: No.
Q: Would you be a surrogate for a single dad?
A: Yes.
Q: If I could change one thing in my life it would be:
A: That my children knew my mom, their grandma. And for my mom to be able to see the beautiful babies that I brought into the world.
Q: The person that I admire most is:
A: ‘My mom. She taught me so much and gave me so much love and strength to grow on. I will never admire anyone more than I admire her.’
Q: What goals have you set for yourself?
A: ‘I have so many goals that I hope to accomplish for my children and myself. My most recent goal is to provide a loving environment for my children to grow up in. I guess this has been my main goal since my children were born.
Q: How are you teaching your children the value of money?
A: Because of the fact that I am a single parent of two boys, unfortunately my kids are very aware of money value. They understand that you must earn money. It definitely doesn’t just come to you. So by my being honest with them about bills and income, they are learning to value the money we have.
The clincher was ‘I have always wanted to...’ and she answered ‘...travel around to different places like the Hawaiian Islands or go on an airplane. That probably sounds funny, but I have never been on one.’
I determined that Tina was about to visit Isles rather to the north of Hawaii, and that she would, indeed, get to go on a plane. We had some preparation to do first, though.
Vivian needed the answers to various questions as to why I wanted to be a parent, a brief financial statement and a photo. I needed to find a donor. Almost as an afterthought, I felt I should also discover what the English legal situation was with regard to surrogate babies.
Finding a donor was easy. Vivian e-mailed me a selection of delights. Most were brown-eyed and dark. One, ‘ED (Egg Donor) #211,’ was gorgeous. She stood out as a real English rose. Vivian described her as ‘Very beautiful, has modelled, has very petite figure. Men can’t take their eyes off her and women want to be her. Very modest, doesn’t seem to know just how lovely she is. Very brainy too, has Masters degree in Civil Engineering.’
She was certainly the one. She was in demand and I had to wait my turn. Her detailed profile was faxed to me and showed that she was from a healthy family as well as being bright. I knew all about her, even to the medical history of her grandparents, but had no idea of her name. I decided to call her ‘Edie’ after her number.